


Shenanigans in the Blackwell Academy Chat Room

by Cryptid1



Category: Life Is Strange (Video Game)
Genre: AU - 2016, Alternate Universe - Everyone Lives/Nobody Dies, Alternate Universe - Happy, Comedy, F/F, chatfic, rated T just in case
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-09-04
Updated: 2016-09-08
Packaged: 2018-08-12 17:20:21
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 2,649
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7942759
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Cryptid1/pseuds/Cryptid1
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Max decides to make a chat room for the students of Blackwell as a way for everyone to communicate more. While that idea mostly succeeds, weirdness and crazy shenanigans of all kinds are bound to happen, and happen they in fact do. After all, Blackwell's pretty strange.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. the kool kids

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Wowsers, my first contribution to the Life is Strange fandom! (One of the more decent fandoms I've been a part of, lol)  
> Hopefully you readers enjoy it, be sure to leave feedback if you do, and happy reading!

**[MAX CAULFIELD] opened [BLACKWELL KOOL KIDS]**

**[MAX CAULFIELD] added [KATE MARSH], [WARREN GRAHAM], [RACHEL AMBER], [VICTORIA CHASE], [NATHAN PRESCOTT], [DANA WARD], [BROOKE SCOTT], [STELLA HILL], [ALYSSA ANDERSON], [HAYDEN JONES], [JULIET WATSON], [TREVOR CLARK], [LUKE PARKER], [EVAN HARRIS], [TAYLOR CHRISTENSEN], [COURTNEY WAGNER], [JUSTIN WILLIAMS], [DANIEL DECOSTA], [ZACHARY RIGGINS], and [LOGAN ROBERTSON]**

  **[RACHEL AMBER] entered [BLACKWELL KOOL KIDS]**  

RACHEL: oooo, chatroom!

MAX: yep. now we can all talk n stuff after curfew

**[WARREN GRAHAM] entered [BLACKWELL KOOL KIDS]**

**[KATE MARSH] entered [BLACKWELL KOOL KIDS]**  

WARREN: well well well, Max comes up with yet another great idea

KATE: Well this is cool ^_^

RACHEL: you mean kool, right? chat name clearly says we're the kool kids

KATE: Oh, yea I guess

**[VICTORIA CHASE] entered [BLACKWELL KOOL KIDS]**

VICTORIA: goddammit, thought this was a Vortex Club chatroom

KATE: please don't use His name in vain

VICTORIA: ...whatever. So is this for the nerds & hipsters in the school?

MAX: No, it's for everyone. well, mostly everyone

WARREN: well guess what you fancy peeps are the minority at Blackwell

MAX: ^

RACHEL: hey, im vortex! not to mention one of it's koolest members :p

WARREN: totally kool

VICTORIA: ...

VICTORIA: why are you like this Rach?

RACHEL: ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯

MAX: she's a free Rachel, she does what she wants

RACHEL: and I wanna be kool :p

KATE: well you already are pretty cool :)

KATE: *kool

WARREN: see? now you get it

RACHEL: aww, thx Katie. youre p' kool too

KATE: ^-^

VICTORIA: so while I'm here, might as well ask what this is for

MAX: okay

MAX: ...

RACHEL: ...

WARREN: ...

KATE: ...

MAX: well? we're waiting

VICTORIA: oh haha, real funny.

VICTORIA: what's this chatroom for?

MAX: just for chatting after curfew hours and such

VICTORIA: well, I've got more important things to do

RACHEL: like what? chatting up Mr. Jefferson for some extra credit only to get completely turned down?

RACHEL: *cough*asusual*cough*

VICTORIA: ... I swear to god I'm kicking you outta the club

**[VICTORIA CHASE] left [BLACKWELL KOOL KIDS]**

RACHEL: i do this shit all the time. she always says that she'll kick me, and she never does xD

 

 

* * *

 

 

RACHEL: SHE FUCKING KICKED ME OUTTA THE CLUB

TAYLOR: lol

VICTORIA: YOU DONT MESS WITH THE QUEEN BEE

VICTORIA: BEEYATCH

RACHEL: dafuq Vic I thought we had something ;-;

VICTORIA: relax you can come back tomorrow

RACHEL: but that party's 2nite!

VICTORIA: >:)

TAYLOR: dang V that's cold XD

RACHEL: you're gonna regret this, _C_ _hase_

**[CHLOE PRICE] entered [BLACKWELL KOOL KIDS]**

CHLOE: sup nerds

RACHEL: ayyyy

VICTORIA: wtf how did you even get in?

RACHEL: I added her when nobody was on last night haha

MAX: CHLOEEEE

CHLOE: MAX!

RACHEL: oh boy here we go

MAX: Hey Chloe

MAX:

CHLOE: omg no

MAX: ( ^3^)

CHLOE: NO EMOJI

MAX: ;-;

VICTORIA: It was only a matter of time before this became lesbian central

RACHEL: i brought this upon us, im sorry not sorry

WARREN: why did you do this to us?

CHLOE: i think you hate this for a hella different reason

WARREN: ....um

**[WARREN GRAHAM] has left [BLACKWELL KOOL KIDS]**

RACHEL: omg ahahahha

MAX: can't believe he's still crushing on me. poor guy, but it really should be obvious that I'm not interested

CHLOE: ye, we gotta get him off your back, otherwise imma kick him right in the balls

MAX: please don't

**[NATHAN PRESCOTT] entered [BLACKWELL KOOL KIDS]**

NATHAN: what's going on

VICTORIA: lesbians, that's what

NATHAN: ?

NATHAN: oh, fucking hell

RACHEL: it couldve been worse, they could be literally sexting or something

CHLOE: oh fuck no, like we'd let you pervs see that

MAX: ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

CHLOE: I SAID NO EMOJI!!

CHLOE: AND  _ESPECIALLY_ NOT THAT ONE

MAX: ( ͡° ʖ̯ ͡°)

RACHEL: (☞ ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)☞

VICTORIA: ( ͡~ ͜ʖ ͡°)

KATE: ( ͡^ ͜ʖ ͡^ )

NATHAN: 凸 [̲̅$̲̅(̲̅ ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°̲̅)̲̅$̲̅] 凸

TAYLOR: ¯\\_( ͠° ͟ʖ °͠ )_/¯

MAX: ( ͡° ͜ʖ ( ͡° ͜ʖ ( ͡° ͜ʖ ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) ͜ʖ ͡°) ͜ʖ ͡°)ʖ ͡°)

**[CHLOE PRICE] has left [BLACKWELL KOOL KIDS]**

 

* * *

 

RACHEL: welp, guess i'm just gonna hang out on here instead of going to a pool party because  _somebody_ kicked me out of the Vortex Club for the night...

CHLOE: dude, cmon. its just one lame party

STELLA: Yea. One out of the, what, 40 or 50 parties you Vortex Club guys have each year

DANA: if it makes you feel any better Rach, it's honestly not anything really special

HAYDEN: yea, it's just a usual pool party. nothing super special or anything

RACHEL: meh, Vic's still gonna get it

RACHEL: anyways imma watch kung fury in my room if any1 wants to join in

**[RACHEL AMBER] has left [BLACKWELL KOOL KIDS]**

STELLA: oh hell yeah!

BROOKE: be there asap

**[STELLA HILL] has left [BLACKWELL KOOL KIDS]**

**[BROOKE SCOTT] has left [BLACKWELL KOOL KIDS]**

HAYDEN: *hums true survivor to self*

DANA: btw Max, is Warren still crushing on you?

MAX: yes... ( -_-)

CHLOE: we hella need to get him off of you, youre my bae

KATE: How about getting him with someone else?

CHLOE: okay thats good n all but who exactly is gonna go out with that science geek?

HAYDEN: how about another geek? *wink wink*

DANA: omg yes. we should totally put him and Brooke on a blind date!

MAX: why her?

DANA: well I might be wrong, but I'm pretty sure she's into him

ALYSSA: yeah she's totally crushing on him

MAX: hold on...

MAX: is  _that_ why she doesn't really talk to me irl??

ALYSSA: i thought i told you about that

MAX: maybe idk

MAX: but yeah that's good. anyways I'm gonna go join in on kung fury cya guys

CHLOE: later dude <3

MAX: WOAH

KATE: ????

DANA: WTF

CHLOE: what?

MAX: YOU JUST USED AN EMOJI

CHLOE: ......

**[CHLOE PRICE] has left [BLACKWELL KOOL KIDS]**

DANA: im questioning everything rn

KATE: Well that's something I never thought I'd see

MAX: yeah I'm totally telling Rachel this. cya guys

**[MAX CAULFIELD] has left [BLACKWELL KOOL KIDS]**

DANA: >>/msg HAYDEN_JONES<<

DANA: >>lol this party's actually kick-ass<<

HAYDEN: >>/msg DANA_WARD<<

HAYDEN: >>make sure Rach never finds out tho<<

DANA: >>yeah, she'd be pissed off. btw scroll up a little bit, you missed it<<

HAYDEN: >>....<<

HAYDEN: >>welp, if thats not a sign of the apocalypse then idk what is<<

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> if you wanna watch Kung Fury here ya go, completely awesome over-the-top movie (warning, gets hella gorey at points so maybe don't watch if you're squeamish): https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bS5P_LAqiVg
> 
> Lenny Translation, if you needed it-  
> Max - oh, ok....  
> Rachel - no problem fam  
> Victoria - whatever you say~  
> Kate - okay! ^-^  
> Nathan - lol I'm richer than you  
> Taylor - no idea why we're doing this but okay  
> Max - NO ESCAPE


	2. chloe needs to cool it with the weed

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> kids, don't smoke weed and then sue me

**[MAX CAULFIELD] entered [BLACKWELL KOOL KIDS]**

MAX: ok does any1 besides Warren have any idea what "cheeky nandos with the lads" means?

RACHEL: not a clue

VICTORIA: cheeky what? 

**[WARREN GRAHAM] entered [BLACKWELL KOOL KIDS]**

WARREN: he he he

RACHEL: what are you going on about now?

WARREN: you know, some cheeky nand0s with the lads

KATE: What?

NATHAN: the fuck are you saying?

RACHEL: brb gonna look this junk up

MAX: I was helping him out, and he just started saying that and smirking. I dont understand

DANA: i think Warren might be the only one who  _does_ understand

RACHEL: um, guys, can anyone read this?

RACHEL: When you're out with the lads and you're having a look in JD and you might fancy the Curry Club at 'Spoons but then your mate Callum who's an absolute ledge and the Archbishop of Banterbury says "Oi brevs let's have a cheeky Nandos instead" and you'll think "Top. Let's smash it."

VICTORIA: that's not english, idc what you say there's no way in hell that is english

MAX: what am I looking at?

RACHEL: apparently the definition of cheeky nandos with the lads

RACHEL: although now im even more confused

**[STELLA HILL] entered [BLACKWELL KOOL KIDS]**

STELLA: any of you lads wanna go for some cheeky nandos?

MAX: oh god not you too

VICTORIA: how many of you ARE there

KATE: God help us o_o

WARREN: laaaads

STELLA: lads! lads! lads!

LUKE: lads

RACHEL: oh shit-biscuits they're spreading

DANA: oh my god..

**[CHLOE PRICE] entered [BLACKWELL KOOL KIDS]**

RACHEL: you came at a bad time

CHLOE: wut?

LUKE: join the lads!

WARREN: laaAds! laaAds!

CHLOE: oh not this shit again

MAX: Chlo help

NATHAN: its just getting fucking stupid at this point

CHLOE: nandos is a british restraunt, i guess cheeky means good or something idk, and lads means pals

WARREN: NOOO

MAX:  _THANK_ YOU

DANA: ohhh

RACHEL: oh yeah I remember that, some kids were doing that a couple years ago

STELLA: darnit

WARREN: time to bring out the big guns

WARREN: >>/play [CHEEKY NANDOS - PERI BOYZ](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NOjG5usM_y4)<<

DANA: ?!?

STELLA: XD

MAX: what the hell

NATHAN: what is this shit

JULIET: wtf i was still idle, that scared the shit outta me

LUKE: cheeeeky

RACHEL: wtf

CHLOE: goddammit

JULIET: the hell is this?

KATE: Oh no

WARREN: OI! OI!

**[CHLOE PRICE] has left [BLACKWELL KOOL KIDS]**

STELLA: CHEEKY NANDOS

**[MAX CAULFIELD] has left [BLACKWELL KOOL KIDS]**

WARREN: MEDIUM HOT

**[NATHAN PRESCOTT] has left [BLACKWELL KOOL KIDS]**

LUKE: CHEEKY NANDOS

**[RACHEL AMBER] has left [BLACKWELL KOOL KIDS]**

WARREN: PERINAISE SAUCE

**[VICTORIA CHASE] has left [BLACKWELL KOOL KIDS]**

STELLA: CHEEKY NANDOS

**[DANA WARD] has left [BLACKWELL KOOL KIDS]**

WARREN: BONELESS THIGHS

**[KATE MARSH] has left [BLACKWELL KOOL KIDS]**

LUKE: CHEEKY NANDOS

 **[JULIET WATSON] has left [BLACKWELL KOOL KIDS]**  

 

* * *

  

MAX: >>/msg RACHEL_AMBER<<

MAX: >>so you wanna come over to my room later & finish up that science project?<<

RACHEL: >>/msg MAX_CAULFIELD<<

RACHEL: >>lol, almost forgot bout that. 8:30 sound good?<<

**[CHLOE PRICE] entered [BLACKWELL KOOL KIDS]**

MAX: heeey

CHLOE: guys guys guys holy fucking shit

RACHEL: what??

CHLOE: oh my god everything i know is a lie

CHLOE: so you know the chicken crossing the road joke?

MAX: yea

RACHEL: who doesn't?

CHLOE: and you know how its more of just a sentence than a joke?

CHLOE: well get this, it really  _is_ a joke

MAX: oh, okay.

CHLOE: its a SUICIDE JOKE

RACHEL: wait  _what_

CHLOE: okay so heres the story

CHLOE: so i was in my room smoking some pot like i usually do

CHLOE: and i look out tha window, and i see a bird or something sitting in the road

MAX: "bird or something"

RACHEL: lol

CHLOE: shut up

CHLOE: okay so im looking at this bird, im high af, and i think of the chicken joke

CHLOE: im still high but thats besides the point

CHLOE: the bird starts flying up, but someone hits it with a car

CHLOE: and then IT HITS ME

CHLOE: THE OTHER SIDE MEANS DEATH

CHLOE: THE CHICKEN IS SUICIDAL SO IT RUNS INTO THE TRAFFIC TO END IT ALL

RACHEL: dafuq

MAX: are you serious..

RACHEL: funny, i think im listening to the perfect song for you rn

RACHEL >>/play [Snap Out Of It - Arctic Monkeys](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1_O_T6Aq85E&feature=youtu.be&t=33s) @ 0:33<<

CHLOE: IM SERIOUS

MAX: you're high, that's what

MAX: i mean, it works but i'm p sure that's not how it's supposed to be taken

RACHEL: yea i think you're reading too deep into this

JULIET: goddammit it happened again

JULIET: what's going on?

RACHEL: scroll up

JULIET: oh

JULIET: hm, "Local Stoner Claims to Uncover Truth of Why the Chicken Crossed the Road"

JULIET: now  _that's_  a good story

CHLOE: STOP TREATING ME LIKE IM CRAZY

MAX: sorry chlo-chlo, but you kinda are rn

RACHEL: mostly because you're high

RACHEL: def not weed-shaming you or anything, but still

JULIET: don't mind me, i'll just be here gathering all the juicy details

MAX: kk

CHLOE: so just becuz im high means im uncredible?

RACHEL: kinda

MAX: not entirely but yea

CHLOE: whatever, youll see. youll ALL see!

**[CHLOE PRICE] went idle**

MAX: well that was... new

RACHEL: not to me lol

JULIET: so Max, what's it like having her as a girlfriend?

MAX: it's interesting for sure, i'll put it that way

JULIET: also, there are rumors that you were previously in a romantic relationship with Warren Graham, and you ditched him to be with Chloe. is this true?

MAX: (╯ಠ︵ಠ)╯︵┻━┻

**[MAX CAULFIELD] has left [BLACKWELL KOOL KIDS]**

RACHEL: whaddya work for TMZ or something?

JULIET: well excuse _me_ for wanting the whole story ¯\\_(ಠ_ಠ)_/¯

JULIET: um, did she?

RACHEL: (-_ლ)

 

* * *

 

CHLOE: yo, im hella stoned again lol

VICTORIA: idgaf

CHLOE: wha, where my girls at?

MAX: doing a science project rn, sorry Chloe. we can talk later <3

**[MAX CAULFIELD] has left [BLACKWELL KOOL KIDS]**

CHLOE: aw cmon, Rach too?

WARREN: ye

CHLOE: uuuughhhhhhh

CHLOE: whaddma gonna do

KATE: Well, although I don't support your drug use, you can always chat with us you know ^-^

CHLOE: NO EMOJI

WARREN: >>/play [Everything's Gonna Be Alright - Bob Marley](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OD3F7J2PeYU)<<

VICTORIA: wtf why're you playing this

WARREN: just.. just go with it

VICTORIA: ohhhh i get it

VICTORIA: p' good thinking, for a total geek

WARREN: um, thanks?

KATE: I think that's the nicest thing you've ever said

KATE: Or typed, idk

VICTORIA: well dont get used to it

CHLOE: you know what else you shouldnt get used to?

CHLOE: ben carson for prez, it aint happening

KATE: Well yeah, he dropped out over a year ago

CHLOE: EXACTLY

VICTORIA: ...

WARREN: um...

WARREN: okay then

CHLOE: also i've got hella blackmail on supermax lol

BROOKE: did someone say  _blackmail_ on  _Max_?

VICTORIA: oh really? well, do tell then...

KATE: Victoria, no

KATE: Don't make me get the spraybottle again

VICTORIA: NO

WARREN: OH THE SPRAYBOTTLE XD

BROOKE: AHAHAH

CHLOE: holyshit tell me about this now

VICTORIA: YOU BETTER  _NOT_

WARREN: okay okay, so a couple weeks ago Kate wanted to stop Queen Bitch here from being... just that

VICTORIA: I swear to  _god_ Graham

WARREN: so guess what? for a whole  _five_ _days_ Kate's following her around with a  _spraybottle_ , and she sprays her everytime she does something bitchy XD

CHLOE: OMFG AHAHAAHA

VICTORIA: you are SO DEAD

KATE: I think it worked... decently :)

VICTORIA: what the fuck were you even spraying me with?

KATE: Holy water

WARREN: oh, i always wondered what that was

VICTORIA: are you suggesting that IM SOME KIND OF DEMON???

KATE: In a metaphorical sort of way yes

KATE: But you're a bit better now

VICTORIA: okay okay, now Chloe's gotta tell us what Ms. Selfie's secret is

CHLOE: yea yeah i'll spill the beans

CHLOE: heheh, that reminds me of that one time at Two Whales...

VICTORIA: I DONT CARE

CHLOE: okAY, yeesh

CHLOE: she said wowsers in bed last week

**[WARREN GRAHAM] has left [BLACKWELL KOOL KIDS]**

BROOKE: YES

VICTORIA: omg XD

KATE: Did not need to know that

VICTORIA: wait why did you say "YES"?

BROOKE: um, what?

BROOKE: because Warren's salty, and that's saltier than anything I've done. So people don't have to call me the salt queen anymore

VICTORIA: yes they will

BROOKE: um

BROOKE: fuck

**[BROOKE SCOTT] has left [BLACKWELL KOOL KIDS]**

VICTORIA: and there you have it

CHLOE: but anyways I think bernie's gonna win

KATE: He dropped out too

CHLOE: How about jeb?

VICTORIA: bitch he dropped out a  _long_ time ago

CHLOE: rubio?

KATE: Omg

KATE: Look, only Trump and Clinton are left. It's just those two

CHLOE: oh fuck that i'm moving to france then, peace out homies

**[CHLOE PRICE] has left [BLACKWELL KOOL KIDS]**

VICTORIA: I dont think you wanna go there either...

KATE: Why? It's very pretty

VICTORIA: yea when it's not... nvm

**[MAX CAULFIELD] entered [BLACKWELL KOOL KIDS]**

**[RACHEL AMBER] entered [BLACKWELL KOOL KIDS]**

MAX: hey Chloee

MAX: wait where'd she go?

VICTORIA: she talked about presidental candidates and left

RACHEL: she stoned?

KATE: Yup

RACHEL: figures lol

MAX: aww

VICTORIA: >>/msg MAX_CAULFIELD<<

VICTORIA: >>so you like to say wowsers under the sheets huh?<<

MAX: >>/msg VICTORIA_CHASE<<

MAX: >>ohhh myyy godddd nooo<<

MAX: >>that was one time.  _one time_ <<

VICTORIA: >>Well, guess ive got some blackmail on you then...<<

MAX: >>ugh, what do you want?<<

VICTORIA: >>I'll think about that. We'll be in touch :)<<

MAX: >>screw you<<

**[VICTORIA CHASE] has left [BLACKWELL KOOL KIDS]**

MAX: hey Kate, can I ask you a favor?

KATE: Sure, what do you need?

MAX: well...

MAX: do you still have that spray bottle?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> uh oh, looks like there's gonna be some conflict....
> 
> Spraybottle thing from this - http://gaybreadlover.tumblr.com/post/128526414447/how-to-train-your-victoria-a-step-by-step  
> So yeah. Warren, Stella, Luke and Brooke are totally the meme team of Blackwell. Don't question it, they just are and that's that.


End file.
